Writing For Someone Else

Question for you: when working with others, how does that impact the expectations you set for yourself?

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Writing for someone else is a scary thing. When I write for myself, I feel safe in knowing that whatever I pull together will be “good enough” for me. If I’m not particularly fond of what I’ve written, and this has happened a few times fairly recently, I can look away and try to forget it. I don’t need to revisit it again if I don’t want to. What’s done is done, and I can move on. On to the next one. On the other hand, if I write something for someone else, it’s more or less written in stone. It’s hard to work around. I can’t really avoid it or detach myself from what is written. It follows me.

I’m working on a project for/with/involving a friend at the moment. And I’m not sure the best way to go about it. I’m faced with this lingering fear that the final result will end up disappointing. What does she expect? Even larger question... what do I/did I expect?

I think it’s important to keep an open mind when creating. To leave room for happy accidents to occur. But I also think it’s important to have some sort of all-encompassing vision/direction that leads the way. I don’t want everything to come across as too random. I don’t want things to run beyond my control. I need to stay in charge up to some level.

So yes... when I write for myself... I feel I can be a bit more reckless. What I write today does not define me tomorrow. And that is a beautiful thing. I am evolving (my writing is evolving) my thoughts may change depending upon the moment. I’m not flaky... I’m just actively thinking and questioning what it is I want to do and where I’d like to go next.

There’s also something useful about failure... those moments when I say to myself... what did I write? What was I saying? Was I saying anything? Or was it an absolute mishmash of disorienting garbage? These thoughts... while uncomfortable, cruel, and bold... offer valuable information as to what I’d like to write next and where I’d like to go or not go in the future. Where are my pitfalls? How do I avoid them?

When writing about someone else... I feel I do have a lot less room for error. Principally, because I may not write about this person again... and even if I do, it won’t nearly be as often as I write about myself. So, I want to get it “right”. What is right? Well, I suppose it’s something that fulfills me. Something that feels honest... but controlled in that it has a level of organization to it. It’s also something that I feel will offer some degree of value to the person I’m writing about. Perhaps they’ll gain some insight into himself/herself... or some exposure to a different audience. Give and take. I hope to gain as much as I offer.

So back to square one.... this project I’m working on. It’s all step one in a huge experiment that may or not go well... I suppose I need to relinquish the idea that it will go 100% well. It is an “experiment" after all. Something new. And I suppose that’s what’s also beautiful about it. Here I am, pushing myself to new places, rather than conforming to routine. Yes, I'm bringing someone along with me. But that does not mean she expects anything more than I do. She shouldn’t. This is a work-in-progress. My life is a work-in-progress. And it shouldn’t be any other way...