27

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Originally written before my 27th birthday on 2/3/2020.

Are you living an invigorated existence?

My birthday is around the corner. Another year on this earth. It’s definitely crept up on me this year. It feels like just yesterday was Christmas. It feels as though Winter never completely happened. Yet, here we are, at the close of January, February oh-so close.

Another year. Another day. I’m still here. A lot has changed between this year and last... but also so little.

I am who I am.

One conflict I dealt with as a child was detaching myself from my past... cringing at thoughts of my decisions. Believing all my worth lay in the future. Today, I’m much more appreciative of where I am.

But thoughts towards my future consume me. I value where I am... but recognize that this is not where I’ll be forever. This is not where I want to be forever.

I’m comfortable, yes. But invigorated, only sometimes. And I don’t think sometimes is enough. The fact that anything I do invigorates me is a beautiful gift that I feel privileged to have. I just need to find ways to sustain this feeling. Feelings are fleeting, perhaps. But I believe each of us can get to know ourselves well enough to determine what it is that makes us tick. What type of lifestyle excites you most? When are you the happiest? What have you done that you want to do more of?

Growing up is about sculpting a lifestyle that suits you. I’ve reached the conclusion that most of us can become comfortable. (I definitely am at the moment.) And the comfort is sometimes what draws us to live a reserved existence. Life is “working”. Not bad. But that doesn’t mean we should settle... Experiences that invigorate us are experiences we should pursue wholeheartedly when we can. For someone young like myself who is still living with my parents, contemplating the next steps in our life journey, we have no excuse but to pursue what invigorates us.

27 is just around the corner. I’ve spent the past year digging deeper into what excites me. I’ve wrote a bunch. Choreographed. Traveled more than I have in my entire life. I’m still figuring out myself, but I’ve discovered plenty that I want more of. And it’s this desire which is illuminating. It’s this desire I hope to harness more of over the course of the next year.

I know what I want. Here’s to more doing, and less hesitation! Here’s to living an invigorated existence, not just a comfortable one!